Becoming a mother is not the easiest task in the world. Often rewarding, although not always. After interviewing 2 different mothers, Noel Ross with 2 children and one on the way, and Michelle Watford with just 2 children, their differences in how life changed are very different.
Ross had her first at a young age during a difficult marriage. The father was not supportive, made promises he didn’t keep, and resulted in a divorce after many years of let-downs. Although these actions had affected the mother and children deeply, there was good that came from it. Ross was able to see how strong she truly was, raising a son and working with little help from the father. She stated “they train you”, from changing diapers to feeding times, you must work on their schedules and learn from it, not on your own. A very selfless task every parent must and should face.
Even in social life a new parents’ perception of everyone changes. It becomes more apparent which of your friends are parents or non-parents. Obvious reasons such as a non-parent complaining of being tired after a 10 hour work shift. They have no idea how much rougher it would be to do that plus having a child, a full time job. Although it is difficult, it is rewarding enough to do it again. Ross has a fortunate third try. Divorced and re-married, Ross’ husband has learned well with the older children how to be. He has been supportive and a good father to his wife’s 2 children. As she stated, he will have “full frontal training” once the new baby arrives. So far he has been trained backwards, the son being 7, the daughter 4, and now a newborn. With the new baby, Ross believes that her husband will learn to be gentle.
For Watford it is quite different. The father is supportive and helps out greatly with the children being raised. Although Watford found it surprising that when their baby was born, the family dynamics changed. It became more of father daughter team versus mother son team. In raising their children they are fully for the children, unfortunately it ends there. It has become routine for them only caring for the children’s well being and spending less time with one another.
Many relationships face this same problem. Having less time for one another due to work and hobbies and being sure that the children are well. Too tired to make time for one another and frustrated with certain actions every day. Unfortunately this is too common in many marriages with young children.
Although it does not always have to be this way, it is always possible to see the greatness in being a parent. The love and support from family and friends. The joy of raising your children to be great successful adults from the lessons learned from their parents. Especially the greatness of their mothers going through all that they do to be sure that their children are safe, cared for, and become great parents themselves someday.